ANY BUSINESS OWNER who's attended a conference, trade fair or even a social event knows that walking into a big room filled with strangers can be daunting.

Yet, those strangers could be potential clients, partners or investors — so it's important to strike up a conversation and let the networking begin. "The most successful people spend [the majority] of their time building and maintaining relationships," says Julia E. Hubbel, a networking expert in Lakewood, Colo., who often advises small-business owners on how to break the ice.

Entrepreneurs looking to grow their companies usually find that "networking is the essence of the business," she says. It's valuable in getting the word out about your company — and critical in generating new sales leads. But many business owners, especially those starting up, have trouble with networking. Why? Many think they have to launch into an agenda-based conversation, aggressively push their product or service, and boast about their own capabilities, she says.

The trick is to forget the artificial-sounding sales pitch. Get to know the person, make him or her feel important, and share information about yourself and your company in a way that's not "all about me," Hubbel says.

Here are five approaches to take, from Hubbel and several business owners who network on a regular basis.

Get happy
Communicate your intense enthusiasm for your product or service. For most entrepreneurs, this is an easy task. "You have to be passionate about what you do," says Jaki Baskow, owner of Baskow & Associates, a Las Vegas event-planning firm. She's currently playing the Hollywood card, raving to people that her company has now branched out and is training celebrities to be public speakers (clients so far include Wayne Newton, Goldie Hawn and Ben Vereen). She finds that an upbeat manner is contagious, encouraging other people to share their passion for what they do. "It really builds momentum," she says.

Stand out
Highlight a unique or unusual aspect of your business. Kimberly Phillips of Houston runs a company that provides party planning, interior decorating and wardrobe consulting services. The unusual part? She only works with pregnant customers (her company is called Mommies Projects Inc.) — a detail that goes over well, especially when she attends events or conferences with fellow female business owners. "It captures women's attention when they find out that my company caters to expectant moms," she says.

Deflect
Don't commandeer the conversation. The most successful networkers have charisma, which means they don't just try to prove their own importance — they try to make the people they talk to feel powerful, too. "People who have charisma make you feel special," says Hubbel. When you strike up a conversation, make sure the person you talk to "feels like they are on a stage and the spotlight is on them," she says. "Guide them to topics that they want to talk about." In the end, charisma is "how people feel when they walk away from you," she says.

Listen
Really hear what the other person is saying. "I think what's important is listening," says Lynn J. Griffith, president of Welcome Florida, a travel agency in Fort Lauderdale, Fla., "I'm so enthusiastic about what I do; it's so much harder to talk to someone who does — I don't know — steel fabricating and try to find something interesting about it." But stepping outside your comfort zone builds your knowledge base and often comes in handy down the road. "Next week, you'll hear [a client] say 'I'm looking for someone in steel'," she says.

Keep in touch
Collecting business cards is not enough; continuing the conversation at later dates is critical to building a long-term relationship. "I never lose contact with people," says Romana Djurovic, president of ImageWest, a Las Vegas company that designs exhibits for trade shows. Sometimes she'll send a potential customer a news article with the message "maybe this will interest you"; other times, she'll use a touch of humor and send a scrunchy ball as a stress-reliever. She's even done some digging to figure out customers' birthdays, so she can send a card. "Remind them you exist, and that you can add value to their lives," she says.